To be completely honest with you, today has left me with a bit of a headache. This morning drama started early at work, as one of my clients was "removed from the program" and will need to be picked up by Friday morning. Luckily that problem was solved several hours later and his family will be able to do all of that... because I was getting the feeling that nobody was really concerned about my super busy schedule or other client's waiting to be seen.
While all of this was going on, there was a huge disagreement between some of my family members and I somehow found myself in the middle. An uncomfortable place to be, to say the least. I found my heart beating about a million beats per minute and my hands started to shake. Conflict makes me uncomfortable. Especially among family members. And especially since I know first hand that little things slowly turn into big things... and it's not far fetched to realize that before long, those big things add up and before you know it - nobody is speaking to each other . It took a while before I realized that I needed to take a step back. Sometimes when people hurt you, you have to ignore it and move on. If you don't do that, there's a good chance you'll say something you'll regret.
Thankgoodness for friends like Denise. I know I talk about her all the time on my blog, but she is one of the few people in my life that gets me. And let's face it, sometimes I just want to vent to a person who knows what I'm going through and doesn't try to make me look at it from another perspective. Because sometimes that doesn't work. Denise -- you saved me from insanity today!
Not to mention, for some reason I am caughing like I have some sort of serious fatal illness... yet I feel fine otherwise? What's up with that?
My saving grace for this afternoon.... thinking about pumpkin lattes, crunchy leaves, grave yards, halloween candy, ghost stories, jack-o-lanterns, and basically everything I can imagine that has to do with fall.
mmmm... yes please!
Kara, you helped me out so much today too. Although my negative feelings always come creeping back in and I have to shoo them away again - your words really made a difference today. I'm glad to be your ear and to help where I can. Thinking about you tonight! Lush you!
ReplyDeleteHi Kara--
ReplyDeleteI just read your post from a few days ago about your thoughts on entering an MSW program. I thought I'd post a comment here since I wasn't sure if you'd see it in an older post.
I am a therapist at a mental health clinic (I got my LMSW last year) and, like you, strongly identify with "difficult" populations. There is something very rewarding about working with people who genuinely need and appreciate a kind ear and an open heart. If you're passionate about it, you should go for it!
Pumpkin spice lattes always make me feel better too! I know how you feel about confrontation, ESPECIALLY with family conflicts. I always get antsy when these things happen and hate to be involved, although it's life and it happens. It's hard to stay in the middle, so just keep your chin up and I hope the best for you!
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