Update

Last Wednesday I had my first taste of real meat in six years. We were out to dinner with Sean's family, and much to everyone's surprise I ordered a chicken ceasar salad. I had been debating this back and forth for a while now {almost 4 months}... so trust me when I say that I did not make this change lightly. I went back and forth, weighing the pro's and con's, before coming to this decision. And honestly, it feels totally natural for me at this time and I haven't even felt much guilt. The truth is, I have gained a lot of weight due to my un-healthy lifestyle... and the processed, fake meat products had to g o.

But I didn't stop there. I have also stopped drinking alcohol {minus last Saturday} and won't do so for another 2 months to help "jump start" my new "diet". I still have an occasional glass of orange or cranberry juice, but mostly just water for now. Which is really really freakin hard, considering I used to go out to eat and get at least 5 glasses of Coke before having to cut myself off!!!!!! Seriously... waiters have joked about me getting a "Sugar Buz" more than once. Many of my friends are really bummed out by this, but I haven't been comfortable in my skin since college and I'm not used to barley squeezing into my fat jeans {you know, the pair that's supposed to make you feel better about yourself because it's a size or two larger than your normal pair... yeah, my fat jeans have officially become my normal jeans. Not Cool!!!}

Ugh. And I already talked about how I've been trying to go to the gym several times a week. I am fortunate enough to have a gym right down the hall from my office at work, but that doesn't make it any easier to go... I will however say that once I do go, I leave feeling sooooo much better. I am shooting for 3 times a week, for 45 minutes.

Here's my inspiration...............

Senior year of high school vs. now... well, minus the dreads {I brushed them out in June}

I have to be honest with you, it's not easy looking at myself in that second picture. I've gotten used to being called too skinny or complimented constantly on my weight, that it's really hard to admit that I've gained weight. It's funny how we sometimes base our worth on how we look. Even those of us, like myself, who like to pretend the opinions of others don't matter. But it's more than just gaining a few pounds, I actually feel unhealthy and sluggish. And as a past swimming & rock climber, I don't like feeling that way. So enough day drinking, munchies, happy hour, pizza 4 nights a week...................... I am officially holding myself responsible through this post and announcing to the world that I'm finally going to commit to getting in shape {no matter how bad I want that pizza & coke.... and ice cream... and cupcakes.... and potatoe chips.... and french fries... you get the picture}!