rain man.

This morning I awoke to quiet tapping. I snuggled close to my sheets and shut my eyes tight and tried to steal another five minutes of sleep. Just five more minutes. Soon the quiet tapping transformed into a full orchestra. It's sole purpose, to sing me back to sleep. Back and forth I rocked, comforted in cool sheets and fluffy pillows. Minutes passed slowly and my body became paralized as I slowly drifted to sleep. Then, the alarm rings and I am shoved back into reality so quickly that I sit up with my head spinning.

Rain Dance -

Don't threaten me with love, baby. Let's just go walking in the rain. {billie holiday}

I am a being of Heaven and Earth, of thunder and lightning, of rain and wind, of the galaxies. {eden ahbez}

I believe in running through the rain and crashing into the person you love and having your lips bleed on each other. {billy bob thornton}

I love the rain. I want the feeling of it on my face. {katherine mansfield}

I think it's really important to use your hands and get close to materials. To be up close to real things like rain and mud; to have contact with nature. {robin day}

Hope you're enjoying the rain today! Breathe it in and feel refreshed!

all photos above found on google

One Week.

Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.

{Ralph Waldo Emerson}

Today is my last full week before the transplant surgery next Tuesday. I am still waiting for the anxiety to come. So far, no sign of it.

This morning I woke up to the rain pounding on my window, and it was not as comforting as usual. I'm just in a weird space today, and feel a little off. Probably because there has been a leak in my ceiling for the past 4 months and the property manager of our loft hasn't kept his word in fixing it. Some people don't realize how sensitive I can be, and it felt good to leave a nasty voicemail this morning... but afterwards I just felt why bother.

I had the most amazing weekend with two of my very good friends, Stuart and Denise. The weather was perfect and it was nice to share our view of the river with them. I am so looking forward to spending a Saturday afternoon with Pete on a nice rock with a blanket, napping in the sun to the sound of the James moving by. I think the rain this morning has depressed me a little... because it's Monday and sunshine always inspires me.

Things are about to change for me, and I have not taken this opportunity lightly. I am so very honored to share my life with Mitchell by giving him something he so desperatly needs: a healthy kidney. To be able to have that much of an impact on some one's life amazes me... and furthers my hope in humanity as a whole. We are all in this together and capable of so much.

I have also thought of ways to improve myself spiritually. You have read about my dread journey and how excited I am to learn about myself through that experince. I look forward to spending a lot of time in nature while I am recovering - there's a healing power that can only be found when one loses themselves in a spring afternoon. I have decided that I may want to try a part time career in journalism of some sort, because I love writing and feel that a creative outlet is exactly what I need at this moment in my life. Being home for a few weeks will give me an opportunity to see what's out there. I also look forward to some quite time of meditation. Things have been so hectic lately that I have neglected my morning ritual of silence, and I am beginning to realize how important this is to my sanity throughout the day.

My mother is coming into town to stay with me for the first week that I am home, and my husband is also going to take off a few days and spend them with me... which makes me feel very loved and cared for. I don't know what the future will bring, but I do know that after next week I will come home with a new outlook on life. I hope to feel inspired, motivated and at peace.

{photo credit}

our week in north carolina..

{packed in the car like nobody's business!}

Wednesday we left our loft once again for another road trip: this time, NC bound. We dropped our puppies off at my parent's house and needless to say, it was close quarters for the hour drive... we were all ready to stretch our legs and my dogs always have a blast in my mom's giant backyard. {i wish they could've come with us!!!}

So we drove 4 hours and finally arrived in North Carolina... and it is so gorgeous here. We are staying in a "village" and our room is where the old stables used to be. I keep hoping this place is haunted, but so far no ghost sightings.

This place was built in the 1930's and it feels like I am in Europe, especially with this misty weather we've had for most of our trip. I went for a jog yesterday and it felt so good to reconnect with nature and really push myself... I haven't been running outside for a few months and the weather was perfect. 

After dinner I walked home and it was sprinkling outside, and I enjoyed breathing in the moist air. I keep pretending I'm back in time and can't help but feeling like I'm a character in The End of the Affair. I swear... I was looking for Bendrix yesterday, pretending I was Sarah. I love pretending.

Today we are going on a mansion tour and I am so excited because I looooove history! I am excited to hear all of the stories and mysteries that this old place seems to be hiding.

Tomorrow we'll be here for a few hours before heading home. I love it here, but I miss our loft and am ready to get back to our crazy, everyday lives.

Hope your week has been as pleasant and calming as mine has been! xxoo