Showing posts with label Mother Earth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mother Earth. Show all posts

Thursday, April 05, 2012

dreams.

Pinned Image

I do not have all of the answers, but I am an old soul and in a past life we lived together in a cottage on top of a mountain. You put every wood panel in place and cut out each window and your salty sweat and hard-worked hands created a magical place. I still remember it; still ache for it and our life together there, in that time and space.

We spent our days walking barefoot through the forest, collecting berries and mushrooms and herbs and flowers. The trees knew us by name, and the moist ground reminded us daily that we came out of the soil and would once again return to it. But not yet. We had too much living to do.

At night, we would sip deep, scarlet wine straight from the bottle until our teeth and lips were stained. You would pull me close to you, and kiss me hard and passionately and sometimes I can still feel my heart racing from those moments. I can still taste the wine on your lips. I can still feel my body melting into you. I still hear the laughter and the quiet ways we would talk without speaking.

We would lay in bed, intertwined and it would be impossible to tell where one body ended and the other began. I still remember the way you would gently touch my hair and kiss my breasts and sometimes, the rain patting on our tin roof made me sure that The Universe was applauding those tender moments.

In that same bed, we would eventually birth our children; little humans created by a holy mixture of our souls and your wild hair and my dark freckles and natures overpowering energy and life force. The forest would be their playground, and we would smile as we heard them in the distant brush beating their chests and howling like cyotes.

They would return to us in the evening, from their secret world of nymphs and faeries and we would pull the sticks and leaves from their hair and kiss their rosy cheeks and wash the soil from their toes and fingernails in a warm bath smelling of lavendar oil. We would wrap them up in cotton pajamas, and the moon would watch over them through their open windows; the owls humming them to sleep.

A day never passed that I didn't look into your eyes and see my very soul reflecting back at me. You were my true soul mate. We both came from the Earth and I was born in you and you were born in me. In that cottage, our love was so intoxicating that at night I lay in bed drunk from spending each dreamy moment with you.

Years would pass; our bodies would age. And we would talk about death and I would always whisper that I wanted to go first; that living in a world without you would be unbearable. But you were wise, and reminded me that a soul never dies. It leaves the body and returns to the wind and rain and leaves and birds and deer and sunshine and each tiny blade of grass from where it initially came.

We were happy. I still remember it; still ache for it and our life together there, in that time and space.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Earth Day Camping!

I am very excited, because this weekend we're going on a camping trip (at the beach!!!) with a bunch of our friends for Earth Day! We leave tomorrow morning and will get home sometime on Sunday. This will be our first camping trip of the year, and I can't wait to go on many more... hopefully the next will be in June for my birthday. I am mostly looking forward to getting out in nature and leaving electronics and other distractions at home -- so I won't be checking in here until sometime on Monday. Have a very happy Earth Day, and make sure you make time to get outside and enjoy nature!


Wednesday, July 28, 2010

intentional living?


So yesterday I was reading this article {after my interest was sparked by this} and started thinking. Mostly about my Carbon Footprint {mines about 5...  please don't ask me why I don't recycle... that needs to change ASAP - so embarrassing!!} and my role in saving the environment. If you read my blog, you know that I love my Mother Earth... and I love community, very much.

This all started a few months back when I was watching Wife Swap.... I know, I know.... lameee. Anyway, one of the wives lives on a Commune and I was so intrigued that I started fantasizing instantly. So for some reason, I started looking up Intentional Living Communities the other day {they're not called Communes as much, anymore} and was really surprised to see one in my area.

Before my husband freaks, I do want to say that I'm not 100% sold on the idea of moving out of the community and disconnecting from the mainstream completely. Plus, they told me that I couldn't bring my dogs... so that right there was a major turn off. But I did like some of the things I read. It kind of made me think about The Beach {one of my favorite movies, no matter what anyone else says!!!} and my idea of Utopia... and how it may actually exist outside of a movie screen.

Everyone working together for the greater good, sharing work loads and money, raising children together. No 'mine' or 'yours'. Ugh... my heart flutters at the sound of that! This is something that I talk my husbands ear off about, and he pretty much thinks I'm crazy.  But I'm ok with that, because I realize that this isn't for everyone. But if your honest with yourself, don't you see the appeal in lifting the weight off your own shoulders and dividing it up amongst a community that supports you?

I do think that an Intentional Living Community sounds a little intense, and sadly I'm not ready to give up my social life or ability to throw house parties. But!!! There are ways to start a "commune" where you make the rules. Basically.... it's like going back to college and picking roommates. Everyone pulls their funds together, buys a house with separate bedrooms but a common living room and kitchen, splits the bills and chores, and comes together to make all of the house decisions. This is what people are doing now, and I'm pretty sure the economy has a lot to do with it. It's sooooo much cheaper and efficient to split everything with a group.

I'm just wondering if, as a married person, I could handle this lifestyle. On the surface, I think that I could. I think that I would enjoy the strong sense of togetherness as our neighborhoods begin to fall apart and we start losing touch with families living as close as next door. I know for a fact I would enjoy dividing responsibilities. The idea of sharing a garden and a compost pile... I love that {Richmond has several Community Garden's spread all over the City and this brings a ginormous smile to my face}. But would I miss my space? And I wonder how important having my own stuff really is to me. That's something I don't think I could imagine until it was no longer there. More importantly, is it really necessary for a married couple to live in house by themselves, or could we benefit by living with several other people who share similar goals?

What do you think -- is it possible that Utopia could actually exist?




p.s. - what's your carbon footprint?

p.p.s.- does anyone have some simple ways to recycle in an apartment building? How could we hide the bins so that our loft doesn't look cluttered?

Monday, June 14, 2010

You Live; You Learn.


I'm gonna be all the way out there, all the way fucking out there. Just on my own. You know, no fucking watch, no map, no axe, no nothing. No nothing. Just be out there. Just be out there in it. You know, big mountains, rivers, sky, game. Just be out there in it, you know? In the wild. {Chris McCandless}

This weekend was pretty much exactly what I needed. I learned a lot about myself and about people in my life who have more of an impact than I may have expected. I laughed. I cried. I was really, really angry. I felt loved. I felt hurt. I felt free. And all of this in 3 days. Communication is probably the most important thing that we have as human beings, and you never appreciate how important it is to vent until you do, and you realize how good it feels. And you also remember how much alike we all really are. And how people maybe even feel the same way that you do, and were just waiting for you to speak up.

I spent every single day in my bathing suit. I think that's really the best way to spend a hot afternoon. I did a lot of thinking at the river, and also a lot of not thinking. A lot of just being. I can't explain how much I love being near the water. Closing my eyes and listening to the current bursting over nearby rocks. Feeling the sun on my skin. Pretending that this is my home; and that I never have to leave. Sometimes I wish that I had the courage to be Chris McCandless and just leave everything behind and head to Alaska or some place far away. Some place where I can set up a tent in the middle of the forest, cook over an open fire, and not think about time or responsibility. Of course, he eventually went crazy and died in the wilderness. But that part isn't really the part I like to focus on. I like to focus on being totally free and completely surrounded by nature. In nature and apart of nature. One hundred percent.

And I think the closest that I will ever be to this type of freedom is when I go camping. Because even though I often fantasize about dropping my career and living somewhere in a tree house or on a beach nobody knows about, I don't think I could do it. I don't think I could leave the people that I love, no matter how much they irritate me. And even Chris  got a little lonely all by himself. As much as I hate to admit it, I think I would also miss gossip magazines and reality tv. I guess I'm not as much of a gypsy as I would like to believe.

So now I am craving a camping trip. I want to pack up my life into a single back pack and sleep on the ground for several nights. Light up the campfire once it gets dark and look up at the stars and the moon and snuggle up in my sleeping bag. Get really dirty. Drink lots of beer. And then when I am tired, come home and take a hot bath. Because it always feels good when you know you can come home.

Yes. I think I will go camping soon.










Friday, June 04, 2010

feeling dreamy.

It's Friday! It's Friday! I feel like taking a walk outside today during my lunch break... I just found out that several vendors are parked along the river, and there are spots for people to picnic on their lunch breaks! I may have to try this out.... a co-worker and I were talking about this yesterday. Can you believe how quickly the week passed? I hope the rain holds off... because tonight I am seeing a friends band play and I really, really want to lay out by the river. I just love this hot weather... driving with the windows down and blasting music. Sundresses. Wildflowers. So. Dreamy.

Basically, this is the mood I am in today:


Today I want to just close my eyes and pretend I am in a bed of wildflowers and long, whispy grass. Laying on a blanket. Sipping lemonaide. Reading a book. And ultimatley - taking a nap underneath the sunshine and some big, puffy clouds. Perfection. There is no better way to spend a day than with Mother Nature.

Have a glorious weekend - rain or shine - and don't be afriad to feel a little dreamy. Put on a sundress and dance. I think that's what I will do this weekend.

xo

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Love your mother... Earth!

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves. {John Muir}

Happy Earth Day -- I hope that today you will take a moment to love your mother. Soak up her sunshine, embrace her leaves and recieve her comfort.

And after you do that... do the same tomorrow, and the next day, and the next...

Monday, March 15, 2010

home.

Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence. {Hal Borland}

It has been a long two weeks. We have only been in our loft for about 2 days before leaving again, and once we returned on Saturday I felt as though I never wanted to leave it again. It feels good to return to you own bed, lay on your own couch, and snuggle for hours with two dogs I have missed terribly. I also feel a little out of touch with my friends, and am ready for us to re-connect. Quickly.

This week I will start preparing for Mitchell & my transplant surgery that will happen the first week in April. I am working long hours to stay caught up, and making a special effort to see each of my clients before I leave. I keep trying to feel the way that others have been telling me I should feel... waiting for the fear to come or the reality that I am giving up one of my organs for another to have life. I don't feel like a hero or that I am doing anything special, and it's hard to explain this to friends and family when they ask. I know that there is good in each of us, and if anyone was in my position - the only living donor available - I think it would be hard for them to keep themselves from giving anything that they could.

I have actually been anticipating the surgery and almost wanting to hurry the process. I continue to strive to be patient and allow myself to fully prepare for this operation, not to rush it. I am thankful that the days have become longer, allowing me more time outside reflecting on this journey. I feel like this experience has brought me so close to myself and humanity. I am so  grateful that I am able to help -- that next month a teenager will have the opportunity to quit dyalisis and live life once again, without pain.

I continue to learn a lot from nature. Every morning I sit outside and feel surrounded by the calmness that only a cool breeze and the moonlight can bring. We are given so much from Mother Earth, that I am eager to give somthing back. I am also in awe of the steady awareness of life and what is really important that has been shown to me throughout all of the tests and meetings. I continue to appreciate the perspective that this opportunity has brought me.

I know that after I leave the hospital, I will return home. I will feel the comfort of being in a familiar place surrounded by people who love me and who are so important to who I have become. Mitchell will also return home, carrying with him a healthy kidney and hopefully a sense of peace. I am so ready for this connection and the serenity it is sure to bring.

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

in love with spring!

{i want sean to buy me this kitten!}

It honestly feels and looks amazing outside this morning. I felt so connected to nature the instant I stepped outside and looked up at the sun rising. I must admit, I loved the snow but I am looking forward to the warm weather that appears to be sticking around for a while!

top ten things i love about spring.

1. napping outside on a blanket in the grass
2. warm breezes
3. dipping my toes in the river & enjoying it's comfort
4. the smell of flowers blooming
5. waking up to birds chirping
6. longer days
7. getting out of the gym & running outside
8. sunshine
9. flip flops & pedicures
10. feeling life a little slower.


I can't wait until Spring is here for good... only a few more weeks :)


I think that no matter how old or infirm I may become, I will always plant a large garden in the spring. Who can resist the feelings of hope and joy that one gets from participating in nature's rebirth? {Edward Giobbi}

Thursday, February 25, 2010

A House in a Tree

{i want to live here!}

I have always always always wanted to live in a tree. This has been my dream my entire life. I think it's because even at a young age, I have always had an incredible connection to nature. I remember playing outside, and my best friend was a tree in our backyard. I used to dance and sing and play around it for hours. One day this tree was cut down, and I cried for days. I tried to bring it back to life by bringing it seeds and watering it's stump every morning. I felt like a peice of me died with her. I will always remember that tree.

Today I woke up feeling alone and a little sad. I have had so much going on lately that I haven't given myself a chance to be still. I miss the sunshine and a warm breeze wrapping me up like a blanket. I need to get back to nature. I miss her and the comfort she brings as she looks into my eyes without judgement. I need to feel the freedom that I once felt as a little girl, dancing around an oak tree without a care in the world.

~

 The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. {Anne Frank}

 
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